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Towano Chikai’s Passionate Interview
“Eh? An interview…?”
It was a certain evening. I was sitting in my room, working on the next manuscript I was going to send in for a light novel contest, when Shinozaki-san, Suzuka’s editor, suddenly called me. I was already feeling fed-up when I picked up, assuming that she was going to talk about random nonsensical things as usual. This time around, though, she actually sounded serious, and quickly cut to the chase.
So the thing is, they want to release a magazine article about Towano Chikai, so we hoped that we could interview you a bit. That’s the request I have for you this time.
“I-I see… it feels weird that you’re calling me with some actual business…”
I did send you an email as well. Did you not see it yet, by chance?
…Well, Suzuka is the one who handles the emails directed to Towano Chikai, since she’s the real one, after all… I’m nothing but a stand-in.
Well, I don’t mind. It’s about the same thing anyway. So will you agree to having an interview? I’d like to do it as soon as possible.
When she asked me that, I started thinking.
…Should I ask Suzuka first? It would be bad if I just accepted it immediately, right? …No wait, this is a job anyway, so there’s no way she wouldn’t accept. Also, an interview shouldn’t be that big of a deal.
“Yes, it should be fine—”
Deciding on that, I accepted the request, but…
“Onii-chan, I have something important to talk about…!”
At the same time, Suzuka stormed into my room. When I saw her this flustered, I was surprised for a second, and quickly said “P-Please wait a moment!” to Shinozaki-san. I turned back to Suzuka.
“I just received an email from Shinozaki-san, and… Wait, is the phone call about that…?!” Suzuka’s expression clouded when she saw the smartphone in my hand. “I-Is it about that? Did you already agree, Onii-chan?”
“Y-Yeah, it was a request for a job, after all.”
When I replied to the affirmative, Suzuka’s head dropped down as she muttered a detached “I didn’t make it in time then…”
“I-Is there some sort of problem?”
I was starting to feel a bit restless, but Suzuka shook her head.
“No, it’s not exactly a problem. Just as you said, I was planning on taking it anyway, since it’s for my job. But I felt like I needed to have a talk before that, so I hurried over…”
“A talk about?”
“Since it will be an interview, they will want to ask you all sorts of details. Naturally, since you will be the one who answers them, I thought that I should create a sheet of questions I expect them to ask.”
…I see, that’s what she meant. That’s just like her, though. It explains why she was panicking like that.
“But I can’t help it now that it’s come to this. Onii-chan, make sure to answer like the normal Towano Chikai would. I’ll be next to you so I can give you advice.”
“I-I get it… But is there really any need to be so worried about it? I’ve been acting as your stand-in all this time, so it’s not like I won’t be able to keep up appearances now.”
Reminiscing about all the hardships and troubles I’ve had to go through as her stand-in, I puffed out my chest in confidence.
“No, an article is always very thorough with detail, so we have to plan ahead even further.”
“That might be the case, but I think it’ll be fine…”
I’ve perfected my little-sister-loving persona, you know? …Although I really don’t feel all too comfortable with that.
“And I’m saying that we can’t let down our guard just yet. Onii-chan, you haven’t completely become the Towano Chikai character yet. If you did, you would be answering the phone saying things like ‘Hello, Towano Chikai here. I’m the man who wants to hug his little sister every time he sees her!’ How about saying things like that in the future?”
“You’re asking for too much here!”
I’d be like a completely different person! What kind of image do you have of the person Towano Chikai?!
“T-That’s not the case. Also, this time around, a lot of people will be reading the article, so we have to make an even stronger case than ever, and make people realize just how much you love little sisters!”
“You’re not wrong about that, but…”
“A-Anyway, letting our guard down isn’t allowed, so remember that, Onii-chan.”
Being her stand-in is a hard job, and it’s because I’m never able to say anything back to her like this. But, well, I can’t help it. It’s an official interview for an article, after all.
“I need to know the contents of the interview, so could you please put Shinozaki-san on speaker so that I can hear her as well?”
When Suzuka said that, I did as I was told and put the phone on speaker. I called out to Shinozaki-san.
“Thank you for waiting. I had to have a quick talk with my little sister…”
Oh, so your little sister is close by? I’m glad to see that you’re as close as always. Anyway, can I start the interview right now?
Suzuka whispered a quiet “Good luck”, and she nodded at me.
By the way, Sensei, how many times have you pushed your little sister down so far?
But when Shinozaki-san started with an absurd question like that, my confidence was immediately broken to pieces.
“Wha—What kind of starting question is that?!”
Well, this is unrelated to the interview. It’s just a personal interest of mine.
“That doesn’t explain anything?!”
What? I was just trying to help you relax and not be as nervous. So how many times now?
“…O-Onii-chan, let’s just go with five…!” Suzuka leaned in and whispered into my ear.
“I won’t answer a question like that!” I retorted.
There’s no reason to tell her anything more than needed!
Now then, since your tension should be gone now, let’s cut to the chase.
“That question really wasn’t necessary, I see…”
As I let out an exasperated sigh, I could hear a faint giggle coming from Shinozaki-san’s end, and the atmosphere grew more relaxed.
First, I’d like to ask you why you wanted to become a light novel author.
So the actual questions are normal, huh? I’ll have to respond to these questions normally as well.
“T-That’s obviously because I love little sisters. I love them so much that I can barely contain it, and before I realized it, I had already written this story…”
Apparently, my response was Towano-Chikai-worthy. Suzuka nodded at my words, still looking close to bursting out with an “Ehehe” laugh.
I see, that sure sounds like Sensei. Pretty hardcore, if you ask me. Do you have any stories of when you had trouble writing on your novel?
“N-No, I never ran into a slump like that or anything. I just feel my fingers move naturally, and before I realize it, another volume was done…”
Since Suzuka says that she feels like she’s possessed while writing it, it’s not necessarily a lie.
So you immediately just start writing a volume, and you don’t think of a general plot first?
“Y-Yes. I’m moved by my love for little sisters so to speak, so I’m just overwhelmed by the will to write.”
Impressive. By the way, how many novels did you write before you debuted?
I looked over at Suzuka to ask for help.
“…Onii-chan, say that this was your first novel ever.”
Suzuka softly whispered into my ear, and I repeated exactly what she said.
Basically, the first novel you ever wrote turned into such a great hit. Sensei really is a genius.
“H-Haha, thank you…”
“…Don’t forget to pretend you love little sisters…!”
“W-Well, that just shows how great my little sister power is, ahaha!”
With Suzuka pointing that out, I quickly added that last sentence. What is ‘little sister power,’ anyway? However, Shinozaki-san showed no signs of suspicion at my response, and continued away. In response to every question, I tried to emphasize that I love little sisters, and every time I was unsure how to answer, Suzuka whispered some advice to me, so we managed to progress through the interview fairly quickly. The questions themselves were also rather normal, like ‘What do you pay the most attention to while writing?’ or ‘Which scene needed the most energy and attention from you while writing so far?’ and so on. The interview was fairly orthodox as a result.
Sensei, which kind of pattern do you prefer the most for your little sister’s panties?
…And she’s suddenly dropping a bombshell of a question on me?!
“Are you trying to make fun of me?!”
In light novels, panties are pretty essential, so a question like this should be expected. I really wanted to ask you about your favorite thing you always think about.
“Have you heard of the term ‘sexual harassment,’ Shinozaki-san?!”
Of course I have. It’s the thing you’re doing most of the time when you’re on the phone with me.
“O-Onii-chan?! What do you normally talk with her about…?!”
“The same sort of thing that’s happening right now! Me suddenly turning into the bad guy!”
Ohh, I know. There was something I wanted to ask Sensei a long time ago, and I finally remembered.
“W-What is it this time?”
The thing is, no matter how often Sensei says that you’re close with your little sister, even though you wrote a little sister novel, some people might not believe you. They want some sort of proof, so I thought that maybe you could take a picture together so that I could add it to the article.
“A picture for proof…”
Maybe even where you push down your little sister.
“As if I could do that?!”
“N-No, let’s take one, Onii-chan! It’s a request from your editor!”
“What are you talking about?!”
“T-This might be a good chanc—Not that! This is all to illustrate the qualities of Towano Chikai!”
“…Eh? S-Seriously? But I’m currently on a phone call so I can’t take a picture—”
“Please wait a moment! …………………I’m back! We can use my laptop or this digital camera!”
“That was fast! You went to get your stuff that quickly?!”
“N-Now, hurry! I really don’t want to do this, but it’s for our job after all!” Suzuka said. She set up the digital camera and laid down in wait on my bed. Since I was left with no other choice, I climbed on top of the bed above her. Anyone looking from the outside would definitely haev thought that I’d pushed Suzuka down like a perverted older brother.
“Ehehe… I really don’t like this at all, but I can’t help it, can I?! Let’s send this to Shinozaki-san immediately!”
Once we had done that, Shinozaki-san was thoroughly pleased with the finished product, Suzuka was content that we had managed to emphasize Towano Chikai’s closeness with his sister, and I was left as the sinner again… Well, after that, things went fairly smoothly, and it felt like we were coming close to the end of the interview, but…
…Hm, that should be all of the questions.
“Phew… Is there something else? I think that I’ve answered enough of your questions.”
When I voiced my exhaustion, Shinozaki-san sounded like she wanted to finish the interview, but wasn’t quite satisfied.
Well, you answered all the questions we prepared and my personal questions, but I still feel like we’re lacking something.
“You’ve been interviewing me for almost an hour now, so shouldn’t that be more than enough?”
…No, something is lacking. This won’t really showcase Towano Chikai’s greatness enough.
“G-Greatness, you say…?”
I want to let more and more people know about your charms as an author. Both concerning your work and yourself. Everything I love about you from the bottom of my heart… That’s why I planned this interview. I want it to be perfect.
“…Shinozaki-san really thinks highly of Towano Chikai.”
Oddly enough, Shinozaki-san seemed to be fairly serious for once… I remembered that she might joke around all day, but at her core, she’s always serious about light novels. Realizing that, I felt my chest burning hotter.
“Um, thank you very much. If that’s the case, then I’ll gladly answer whatever question you have.”
Thank you very much, Sensei. It would be fine to continue just interviewing you like this, but…
After saying that, Shinozaki-san fell silent, as if she was thinking about something. Once a short moment passed, she said Ah, I know! as if she remembered something, and spoke up again.
I thought of something great. We call the personal interview with Sensei done, and we go interview the people in Sensei’s surroundings as well. How about it? It sounds interesting, right?
“………Eh? W-What do you…?”
Shinozaki-san sounded rather lax about it, but I had a bad premonition.
I was thinking that I should interview people who know Sensei as well and ask them for their impressions of you. If I did that, I would receive countless other opinions about you, from all sorts of people, don’t you think?
“The people around me…”
First should be Ahegao Double Peace-sensei. She’s the illustrator for your novel after all, so she’s your partner at work, so there must be a lot of things she knows and thinks of you. After that is Enryuu-sensei. She’s a fellow author, and you even knew about her earlier, since you’re classmates. Then, let’s see… oh right, you’re on pretty good terms with the voice actress Minazuki Sakura-san, right? Interviewing her alone would be beneficial either way, but I’m sure that she has a lot to say about you as well.
“So that really is your plan, huh?!”
My bad premonition turned out to be the truth when Shinozaki-san started to name all the people that I didn’t want her to name… I mean, her idea isn’t bad in any way, and her choice of people shows that she knows what she’s doing, too, but I can already tell how this is going to end!
Not to mention that Shinozaki-san wasn’t quite done with her list of names.
Ah, I know! Since this is a good opportunity, let’s talk to your little sister as well!
I really started to panic when I heard Shinozaki-san’s words, but she didn’t seem to think that anything was weird at all. She just continued talking.
I’ve never had the chance to talk to a real little sister of an author who only writes little sister novels, after all! Fufufu, even I’m scared at how genius I am!
“No no no! Hold on for just a second!”
Don’t you agree that this is a wonderful idea? Also, you don’t have to worry. I’ll keep her identity a secret. After all, I am a considerate, honest editor!
“If you’re that considerate, then don’t come up with a plan like that in the first place!”
Your little sister must be with you, right? I’d like to talk to her personally, if possible.
Ignoring my reply, Shinozaki-san just moved on with her plan… H-How could this happen? At this rate, I’ll really end up looking like a perverted older brother who gets his little sister into all these situations! No matter how much of a stand-in I am, I can’t allow that to happen at any cost. Thus, I was about to shoot down her idea, and also her idea to interview Mai and the others, but…
“Y-Yes, I’m listening! I’ll gladly accept that offer!”
However, before I could open my mouth, Suzuka responded. What are you thinking?!
“…C-Calm down, Onii-chan! Just as Shinozaki-san said, this isn’t that bad of an idea. After all, I can show everyone just how close Onii-chan and I are—Nevermind that! I will be able to fortify the image of Towano Chikai as much as I want, myself!”
“You don’t seem to be aware of what people will think of me if you do that!”
“Also, I can’t allow anyone else to use this chance to talk about some sort of romantic relationship with Onii-chan…! A-Anyway, all things considered, I have to accept this no matter what!”
Her cheeks were red, and she averted her gaze. I was left unable to say anything, and let out a defeated sigh… Ugh, since I’m just a stand-in, I can’t go against the author’s orders…!
Ohh, is that your little sister!? So you’ll accept it?!
“Y-Yes, it’s my duty as a little sister to assist Onii-chan’s job in any sort of way!”
Really, you are a gift from the heavens, Imouto-san… I’m really envious that you have such a wonderful little sister, Sensei!
“Oh I sure am happy!”
I gave up. I had already accepted the fact that my opinion would never matter in this cruel reality.
Fu fu fu, now that it’s decided, let me quickly give everyone a call, and decide on the exact time for the interview…!
“Ehehehe, what a wonderful chance…! W-Well, I’m not really happy about this, though?!”
The two of them were just saying whatever they wanted at this point, and I could only let out a defeated sigh.
“I’m really thankful that you’ve all gathered here today for this occasion. Thanks to you all, I’m certain that we will get even better results than before.”
It was another day. Suzuka had accepted Shinozaki-san’s request for an interview with her, and we had gone to the Sumeragi Fantasy Publishing editorial department in Tokyo. However, it wasn’t just the two of us that were there…
“…Why is everyone else here as well?”
“I thought that we might as well finish up all the interviewing at once. Luckily, everyone had an open schedule for the day.”
“Since it was an interview about you, I ignored my dangerously close deadline to come all the way here, you know?!”
“I can’t miss out on something as interesting as this, desu, so I slipped away from my eroge job!”
“Right! Sakura also barely managed to shift her schedule around enough to make it here! She’s looking forward to the interview, though!”
Mai, Double Peace-sensei, and even Minazuki-san were all there, too… Again, I have a really bad feeling about this…!
“…Hmpf, I thought that things might end up like this. It would have been a miracle if it didn’t, to be honest. I’ll just have to work hard to show everyone how close we are, to make sure that I don’t lose against anyone…! Ehehe…”
Suzuka was acting like always, muttering something to herself, which didn’t exactly make me feel any better.
“Now then, you’ve all made it here despite your tight schedules, so let’s start immediately.”
Shortly after, Shinozaki-san took a seat and pulled out a writing tablet to record our conversation.
“…Hm, what to do about this? I had planned to ask everyone questions one at a time, but since we’re all here, maybe we have everyone answer the same questions at once.”
“Sounds good, desu. You’re going to ask everyone the same questions, after all.”
Everyone nodded along with Double Peace-sensei’s suggestion.
“Then, let’s do it like that. The first question is… Can I ask you all about your relationships with Sensei?”
“I am his number one fan, and his lifetime rival.”
“I am his number one partner, desu.”
“Sakura is his number one future little sister.”
“I-I am his number one real little sister!”
Everyone answered at once, and chaos began to ensue.
“Hey, I’m his true number one, so don’t copy me!”
“That won’t do, Mai, desu. I won’t give away the rank of being Sensei’s number one!”
“Yeah yeah, Sakura won’t allow Enryuu-sensei to hog all the attention.”
“You all say that, but considering that I’m his real little sister, I deserve the title number one the most.”
…What is this situation? Immediately after they answered answer her question, a fight broke out?
“Hmm, I see…”
And Shinozaki-san was just calmly writing on her tablet.
“U-Umm, is it really fine to not get everything back under control?”
“Hm? Why is that? They’re all answering me fine, and I can feel their raw emotions this way. Thanks to that, I can feel like the article will be even better than before.”
Ah, this one’s done for. Now that the interviewer is acting like this, I’ll never be rid of this chaos.
“Then, the next question. Could I ask you to describe the first meeting between you and Towano-sensei?”
“It was a fateful encounter, yes… After I received an immense stimulus from Towano Chikai’s novel, I found out that the author was actually a classmate from my school, so I called him up to the roof. Then, Yuu said to me ‘That’s Enryuu Homura for you. You definitely have the right to be my rival’ and accepted me—”
“When I first read Sensei’s novel, I was very aroused, desu! I became a complete victim to the hidden perversity and the erotic actions of the characters! The next day, I happened to meet Sensei at an eroge shop, and when I called out to Sensei, he said ‘It was good of you to immediately realize it. I see that we both share the same perverted soul’ and smiled at me—”
“Sakura read Sensei’s novel, and she thought that he must be the ideal older brother! Then she became a huge fan of his, and she was really surprised when she went to the signing session! After all, Sensei was the spitting image of the Onii-chan in the novel! That’s why Sakura swore to herself that she would definitely become Sensei’s little sister one day! When he realized that, Sensei said ‘I wish I had a little sister like you, Sakura’, which made her really happy—”
“W-Wait a second please?!”
Mai, Double Peace-sensei, and Minazuki-san all started talking about my first meeting with each of them. They were all enthusiastically arguing with each other, which really made me feel their passionate feelings for the person Towano Chikai, but the contents of what they’re saying are way too over the top?! And I don’t remember ever saying any of those things?!
“E-Everyone, please don’t lie about these things!”
Even Suzuka felt the urge to respond after that, but…
“I-It’s not a complete lie!”
“Right, desu. It’s just a slight alteration of memories.”
“Eh? But Sensei really said that, though? And least in Sakura’s memories.”
And all they’re doing is trying to cover it up, rephrase it, or blame it on their bad memory!
“I see, I see… So you all met Sensei like that…”
Not to mention that Shinozaki-san completely believed their ridiculous lies, and just kept writing on her tablet… Are you really fine with this…?
“Hmph… I see what you are trying to do, everyone…!”
But when Suzuka saw through their plans, Mai said the following.
“But, Suzuka-san, since you’re his little sister, your first meeting was nothing special at all, right?”
Those words made Suzuka twitch in shock.
“T-That’s not the case! Even Onii-chan and I have had a fateful meeting! I remember it clearly! The moment I was born, Onii-chan said ‘I have been waiting for your arrival, my cute, beloved little sister…’!”
“You’re joining them?!”
There’s no way you’d have any memories from the exact day you were born! Also, we’re only one year apart, so I find it unlikely that I was able to say something like that back then!
“Suzuka-san, I really think that that story might be fabricated…”
“That just sounds like your fantasy, desu!”
“Even Sakura can’t even muster the courage to laugh at that.”
Funnily enough, everyone was now making fun of her. Do you still wonder why I’m exhausted every time I’m forced to be with them?
“I-I’m not lying or anything! And I don’t think that anyone else has the right to scorn me for this!”
“T-That’s… I just tried to make it sound more interesting…!”
And thus, another war of words broke out. Why does a normal interview have to end up like this?
“Um, Shinozaki-san, I really think that we should be stopping them…”
“—Like this, each and every single one of them has their own special relationship with Towano Chikai, and is ready to prove that with fighting words. That is Sensei’s charm. Every woman around him, including his little sister, thinks dearly of him—Hm? Did you say something? I was just thinking about how to phrase this, so I wasn’t listening.”
“Is this really going to be an article for a special issue?! This sounds more like a women’s gossip magazine than anything?!”
In response, Shinozaki-san just laughed off my words with “Sensei really says some funny stuff at times”, but I didn’t mean it as a joke at all! Not! One! Bit!
And as if to make things worse, Suzuka and the others were getting even louder… I-I have to do something…!
“S-Stop stop stop! We’re all starting a war here, so I think that having everyone answer one by one is more efficient, Shinozaki-san!” I quickly stepped between them.
“I don’t really mind. But Sensei, you’re unexpectedly keen on taking responsibility for things.”
The one who should be taking responsibility and breaking up this situation is you, though! Why can’t you see that?! …Well, I’d really like to say that, but I wouldn’t gain anything from it, so I might as well just shut up…!
“But that way might still be more efficient. There are some individual questions that I would like to ask, as well.”
Apparently, my desperate efforts weren’t in vain. With this, we should avoid the worst-case scenario of everyone going rampant… or so I wanted to think.
“Then, could I start by interviewing Enryuu-sensei first?”
“Bring it on!” Mai said with an arrogant snort.
Really, why are you like this with just a normal interview…?
“To make sure that she doesn’t give any false testimony, we have to fact-check her!”
“Mutual monitoring it is!”
“Sounds good to me, desu!”
Everyone else was now preparing to start a new type of war… Even Suzuka. In the meantime, though, Mai’s interview was progressing smoothly, and she was answering questions like ‘What do you think is the charm of Towano Chikai’s novel?’ and ‘As a fellow light novel author, what do you think about Towano Chikai’s novel from a literary standpoint?’ and so on, seeming to focus on the fact that Mai was also a light novel author.
Fundamentally, Mai is clumsy, and she has stalker tendencies, but when it comes to light novels, she’s as serious as can be, and her answers were equally diligent… That being said, knowing the questioner and the one being asked, it should be obvious that these happy-happy fun times wouldn’t continue forever.
“Since you’re Sensei’s classmate, Enryuu-sensei, I was wondering what he’s like at school. Is he popular with the girls, by any chance?”
“What kinds of questions are you asking her now?!”
“I just thought that I’d focus a bit more on your private life, as well. So, what about it, Enryuu-sensei?”
“L-Let me see. Yuu doesn’t talk to any girls aside from me at school, I think?”
“Oh? So do you think that Sensei doesn’t have any charm as a male?”
“Eh? I-I-I don’t think that that’s the case, but I haven’t really paid any attention to that! But I’ve never seen him talking with any other girls!”
Ugh… I can’t argue against that.
Suzuka had a similar glare on her face, though I don’t know why.
“That reminds me, since you’ve started attending the same school as Sensei, have there ever been any fanservice events that have happened?”
“Hold on, isn’t that question taking it too far?!”
“Don’t worry. This is a personal question, so it won’t appear in the article!”
“That doesn’t mean that you can just ask that?!”
“F-F-F-Fanservice?! Well, stuff like that might have happened?! Yuu is a perverted demon, after all?!”
“Hey! Nothing like that has ever happened! Don’t just answer her question in such a vague and misinterpretable way?!”
“Mai is lying, okay?! Why are you glaring at me?!”
The person who had brought this situation upon me, Shinozaki-san, didn’t pay me any heed She just leisurely continued with her questioning. “Alright. Next question, then…” Shortly after, Mai’s interview came to an end. It felt like I was the one being interviewed…
“Next I’d like to interview Ahegao-sensei.”
Naturally, that didn’t mean that I could relax yet… Next is Double Peace-sensei’s interview, huh…? This could go just as bad as Mai’s… or even worse…
“What do you pay the most attention to when working on the illustrations for Sensei’s novel?”
“The dirtiness, of course!”
There it is!
“Oh, and what specifically?”
“I can always feel an intense dirtiness from Sensei’s novel, desu! I make sure to pick up on that and put it into my illustrations! It’s my duty as his number one partner!”
“I see. I’m glad that you’re so enthusiastic about your job.”
“Hold on, you can’t just agree to that?!”
“Why is that, Sensei? Light novels and perversity are closely intertwined. There aren’t many illustrators who are this passionate about their work, you know? You’re really lucky.”
I do agree that her illustrations are insanely good, but that’s not the point here!
“I-I don’t think that Onii-chan put any of those kinds of thoughts or feelings into his novel, though…!” Suzuka interjected.
Well, it is her novel after all. She probably isn’t able to keep quiet about it any more than this.
“No no, it definitely is there, desu! I can tell for sure. Well, it’s still too early for Imouto-san to be confronted with the world of pervertedness, so you can’t be blamed for it, desu.”
But Double Peace-sensei immediately destroyed Suzuka’s argument.
“Wha—?! M-My mistake! There definitely is a sublime pervertedness in Onii-chan’s novel! So much so that even I understand!”
Suzuka took back her words, and is now blurting out total nonsense?! I know that you don’t want to lose against Double Peace-sensei, and I know that you’re a perfectionist, but do you even understand what you’re saying right now?!
“I see! So Sensei put sublime pervertedness in the novel, and it was enough for even Imouto-san to notice it! …I need to write that down. Fufu.”
“I didn’t! And don’t take notes about weird stuff like that!”
“But the two of them said it, you know? I felt something like that in there, so I agree.”
“Don’t just agree with them! I’m denying it, and I’m the one who wrote it!”
“Oh my, so Sensei did it subconsciously! Just how much of a genius are you…?!” Shinozaki-san continued to jot down her notes.
Damn it… no matter how much I try to deny it, they won’t listen…!
Shortly after, Double Peace-sensei’s interview came to a close. The whole time it went on, Suzuka still tried her best to make it sound like Towano Chikai was even more of a little sister lover, which resulted in Shinozaki-san constantly writing down notes about how much of a perverted bastard Towano Chikai is… Suzuka, are you really fine with that?
“Now then, Minazuki-san? Can I interview you next?”
“It’s finally Sakura’s turn!”
Though she isn’t the type of person to tell lies or badmouth people, her honesty is scary in a different way. You can never guess how she’s going to answer those questions…!
“I’d like your honest opinion. What kind of person is Sensei to you?”
“The perfect Onii-chan! He promised that he would make Sakura his little sister in the future!”
“O-O-O-Onii-chan?! When did you make that promise…?!”
“Never! I never did! And Minazuki-san, don’t say weird stuff like that!”
“Oh, really? Apologies, Sakura is always talking with her imaginary Onii-chan, so she wasn’t sure if that had happened in reality or not.”
“Yes! Thanks to him, Sakura can practice being a little sister all the time!”
“That’s a popular voice actress for you. She sure is dedicated.”
I-I mean, I can tell that she’s passionate, sure, but isn’t she taking it a bit too far…?
“But, is that so…? So you didn’t promise it yet…? So, Sensei, you won’t make Sakura your little sister?”
Minazuki-san’s shoulders sunk, and she looked at me with the eyes of a thrown-out puppy… Uuuu, if you make that face, it makes me feel like I did something bad…
“O-Onii-chan, why aren’t you rejecting her?!”
“E-Even if you say that…!”
“So since you’re not saying no, you’ll make Sakura your little sister in the future, then?! Yay yay yay~” Minazuki-san’s face lit up immediately. Unfair.
“Hmm, but if that were to happen, I wonder what Imouto-san would think?”
Shinozaki-san muttered to herself, which made Suzuka nod.
“I don’t know about Onii-chan, but I don’t think that doing that is a good thing!”
“But won’t you get in each other’s way, then?”
Minazuki-san shook her head.
“That’s not going to happen! I also love Suzuka-chan, so I’m sure that we can be the best sisters ever!”
“W-What kind of ridiculous things are you talking about?!”
“Eh? Suzuka-chan, do you hate Sakura…?”
“T-That’s not what I meant by that!”
You’re unable to say no yourself now that she’s acting all depressed, aren’t you?!
“Then it’s fine! Sakura and Suzuka will surely be as close as we can be as siblings! And I think that Suzuka-chan should be the Onee-chan!”
“A-Again, what makes you think it’ll end up like that?!”
“…Minazuki-san is already very close to Towano-sensei’s little sister, so there might be a chance that she could actually become his little sister in the future… I see…” Shinozaki-san continued to mutter to herself as she wrote things down.
…What in the world is going on here? At the least, Minazuki-san’s interview went rather smoothly after that, and even though Suzuka continued to complain here and there, nothing bad happened… Still, I wonder if I’ll get killed if fans of Minazuki-san end up reading this article… I’ll definitely have to look it over one last time before they release it.
“Alright, then let’s finish this off with an interview of Imouto-san.”
“P-Please treat me well.”
And now, it was Suzuka’s turn. Well, since it’s Suzuka, she surely won’t go as overboard with her responses as the others.
“In your eyes, just what kind of older brother is Sensei to you?”
“He’s a crazy little sister-loving Onii-chan who thinks about little sisters 24/7!”
Alas, my expectations were subverted, and Suzuka’s response sucked the rest of my hope out of me. I-I know that she’s trying to emphasize the character traits of Towano Chikai here, but don’t you think that response is taking it too far?! Aren’t you forgetting that everyone will see me in a very strange light?!
“I see. So if even Imouto-san thinks this, then it must be the truth.”
“Y-Yes, Onii-chan really is a helpless, good-for-nothing, fanatic little sister lover. I-I really am troubled because of him!”
“Oho. Then, while we’re at it, could you tell us a story that’s a good example of that little-sister-loving side of your older brother?”
“Of course I can.”
…Hey, wait a damn second. There shouldn’t be any story like that, so why are you going along with it? …W-What is she going to say…? I have a really bad feeling about this!
“F-For example, whenever I’m making food, he suddenly hugs me from behind, softly whispering ‘That apron looks cute on you’ into my ear, or he’ll come over to me when I’m sitting on the couch and ask me to give him a lap pillow all of a sudden, or he’ll pinch me in my cheeks, saying ‘You’re really cute…’ and many more things…!”
And my bad premonitions seemed to be right on point. Of course, I didn’t have any recollection of ever doing any such things.
“Ohh, so that’s what he normally does.”
“Y-Yes, but these things are the ones that are more on the gentler side. A while ago, he said ‘I want to thoroughly enjoy your scent’, and he went and sniffed me right after I got out of the bath…! H-He really is a troubling Onii-chan…! Ehehe…”
I couldn’t just keep quiet and watch anymore. This is going way too far! I’m slowly turning into a fiendish, perverted older brother!
“Uwah… you do that to Suzuka-san on a regular basis? That’s a bit tough…”
See? Even Mai is looking at me with a disgusted expression! I really want to die now!
“I-I really am not doing any of that, okay?! Don’t just take her words for granted!” I tried to frantically deny it, but…
“O-Onii-chan, don’t interrupt our interview.”
“Exactly. There’s no reason to be flustered. These stories will be wonderful material for this article!”
I was immediately shot down yet again. Why is the original creator being treated this way?! But I wasn’t given any time to complain, and Suzuka happily told more made-up stories. Shinozaki-san herself was more than satisfied with the way things were going. Are you actually fine with Towano Chikai being regarded as the most perverted older brother imaginable?! Also, Shinozaki-san, do me a favour and start questioning her stories a little, please!
Still, neither of them could sense my internal anguish, and the interview continued as chaotically as ever…
“Alright… Thanks to this, it’ll be a wonderful article!”
“Why exactly are you so happy about that…?”
Everything after that was hell for me, and the interview for the others came to an end. Safely, more or less. To make sure all that information doesn’t end up in the actual article, I’ll have to confront Shinozaki-san later, but for today, I’m tired. I want to go home.
“S-Shinozaki-san, that will be enough interviewing, right?”
“Yeah. That should be more than enough for the interviewing part, but…”
With her eyes still looking down at the tablet, Shinozaki-san didn’t have a face that showed satisfaction… Hey, are you trying to tell me that something is still missing?
“Excuse me. Shinozaki-san, the head editor is asking for you.”
Another woman who seemed like an editor entered the room and took Shinozaki-san with her. Shinozaki-san gave us a short “I’ll be right back.”
In that moment, Shinozaki-san looked like she had a moment of weakness when she tripped ever so slightly.
“Ah, are you okay?”
“It’s nothing. Anyway, please wait just a moment.”
I did feel a bit confused by that exchange, but in the meantime, the other editor brought us some coffee and spoke up.
“Recently, Shinozaki-san has been very passionate about Sensei’s article, and she’s been working late every day trying to write the best article ever. Maybe she’s really tired.” She sounded worried.
After that woman left again, the topic of the conversation naturally drifted towards Shinozaki-san.
“Shinozaki-san really is enthusiastic about anything Sensei-related, desu. Such as when we’re talking about the light novel illustrations.”
“I’m not all too familiar since she’s not my editor, but I hear that she always devotes herself to Yuu’s novel.”
“Amazing. She really likes Sensei’s novel, huh?!”
While the others were talking about things that, Suzuka spoke to me in a quiet voice.
“…Onii-chan, did you notice that Shinozaki-san didn’t seem quite satisfied just now?”
“That just shows how much she wants this article about Towano Chikai to be perfect. I think we have to help her out.”
I agree with that. Since she’s working so hard despite being tired, I feel nothing but gratitude for her.
“…M-Maybe I should think of an even more extreme story about Onii-chan…!”
“Don’t make things any worse than they already are!”
That’s not what I meant! Anyway, I don’t want my image to suffer any more than this, but if there’s anything else I can help with, I’m more than ready.
“I’m sorry for making you wait like that.”
While I was thinking that, Shinozaki-san returned.
“Umm… What were we talking about…? Ah, I know. I wanted to thank you all for gathering here to join me in this interview session. Thanks to that, I… should be able to write the article, but…”
“Is there still something missing?”
“Yes, that’s how it looks, Sensei. It’s not directly related to the interview, but there’s one more topic I really need to clear up…”
It seems like Shinozaki-san is really aiming higher and higher.
Suzuka gazed at me, and I nodded and opened my mouth.
“Well, if there’s anything we can do, then we’d be glad to help out.”
“Hm? …Haha, well thank you for that, Sensei. You really are a kind man. Just how can I thank you—?”
But then, she realized something, and stopped mid-sentence.
“Oh, I know!”
“I’ve heard all about it! You’re always collecting data by being flirty with your little sister, right? If I could put that into the article, it would be perfect, I’m sure!”
Shinozaki-san added an enthusiastic “Why did I never realize it?!” but that didn’t exactly help us, either… C-Collect data?
“So how about it, Sensei? Could you show me right now how you normally collect data with your little sister?”
…S-So basically, you’re telling me to be flirty with Suzuka right now…? T-That’s a bit…
“Y-Yes, I understand.”
Contrary to my expectations, Suzuka gave immediate consent.
“O-Onii-chan, we were just saying that we should support Shinozaki-san in any way possible…!”
“…I-I know that, but collecting data for the article? Are you really fine with that?”
“…I-I don’t mind. On the contrary, this is a perfect chance…! With this, I can show it to everyone…! A-Anyway, it’s for Shinozaki-san’s sake, so let’s do this.”
Ugh, I can’t talk back if Suzuka is that adamant about it…
“U-Umm… What exactly should we be doing, then…?” I asked.
“Hm? The same things you do all the time should be fine… But let’s see… How about reenacting a scene you’ve already written? Maybe the scene where the protagonist is tickling the little sister’s chin as he lifts her face up, maybe?”
“Why is there a scene like that in there?!”
“You were the one that wrote it, weren’t you? Now, hurry.”
No, Suzuka was the one that wrote it, not me…!
“O-O-O-O-O-O-Onii-chan, h-h-h-here you go…!”
Wait, there really is a scene like that?! What kind of situation does that happen in?! But this isn’t the atmosphere where we can just back down. Suzuka’s face turned bright red as she waited for my next move. Shinozaki-san aside, even Mai and the others were completely engrossed in watching us, waiting for me to act… Shit!
I steeled my determination—although rather half-baked still—and stretched out my hand towards Suzuka.
S-She said tickling, right? Something like this, then? …While I carefully started to trace my fingers around Suzuka’s chin, Suzuka let out moans and groans like “…Mmm…” and “Hyan!” Each one made me twitch every single time. Shortly after, Suzuka’s breathing grew more rough, tears started building up in her eyes, and I could feel something very bad welling up inside me.
“Oohhh, now this is wonderful!”
“Now this looks very erotic, desu!”
“How nice, Suzuka-chan…”
All of them… Damn it…! But stopping there was out of the question, so I carefully lifted Suzuka’s face.
Suzuka seemed more absent-minded than ever, and looked up at me with a passionate gaze. Finally, she closed her eyes and—
“Ohh, finish it now, Sensei!”
“As if?! Also, Suzuka, don’t just get swept along with the mood here!”
My heart skipped a beat there just then! Ahh, for crying out loud…!
“What, you’re going to stop there? But it really was wonderful to look at! Now this is what I expected when you were talking about gathering data!”
“Y-Yes… Now you should be satisfied, and will be able to write a perfect article, right?”
“Now then, to the next scene!”
“Of course! I never knew how wonderful this was! I want to see even more! With this, I’m sure that I’ll write the best article there ever was!”
“B-But, what next scene, um…”
“How about you reenact the scene where the older brother is hugging his little sister while sniffing her?! That one’s in the next volume!”
“It is. You’re the one who wrote it.”
“O-Onii-chan, hurry up and sniff me… nya…!”
Suzuka had already bugged out from the previous event, and now she’s looking at me with distant eyes, unable to resist in any way—Ahh, whatever happens, happens! Suzuka, don’t blame me for this!
I stopped thinking and just tightly embraced her, breathing in her scent… Now I’m truly a pervert…!
“O-Onii-chan, it tickles… Ehehehehe…”
Suzuka is bugging out, I’ve stopped caring, my brain cells are being attacked by this sweet aroma coming from her, and behind me, I can hear people getting louder and louder.
“What a wonderful sight! So this is the secret to Towano Chikai’s quality! Next, if you would!”
“Ahh, just do whatever you want!”
Until Shinozaki-san was satisfied, I had to continue showing her all sorts of ways that we would collect data… For crying out loud!
“Imouto-san, could I ask you one last question?”
Shortly after, Shinozaki-san seemed content and satisfied, and boldly stated that she would be able to write a wonderful article. After she thanked everyone, we went our separate ways again. After the others left, Onii-chan said he would go wash his face, and headed to the toilet. This left me alone with Shinozaki-san, and that’s when she spoke up.
“After today’s interview and seeing you collect data firsthand like that, I could once again see Sensei’s immense love for little sisters, including you, and your devotion to him. Thank you.”
“N-No, it wasn’t that big of a deal or anything! I’m just helping Onii-chan out, although unwillingly, because it’s my duty as a little sister!”
Fufufu, the operation was a perfect success! We showed everyone just how much Onii-chan loves little sisters, and now there’s no way they could doubt that we’re close siblings! While I was happily humming to myself, Shinozaki-san continued.
“So my question is this. I think that your relationship with Sensei is truly magnificent. However, is it really all that pleasant to have an older brother who’s so fanatic about little sisters? You keep saying something about a duty as a little sister,” Narrowing her eyes, Shinozaki-san spoke in a serious tone.
…I see. I understand what she wants to say. If Onii-chan really was like that, then it’d spell trouble for any little sister. But I am different. I love Onii-chan, after all. Also, it is my wish that he acts more like the older brother in a little sister novel, so this is even better for me. More than that, I also wish that he’d always act like that, flirting with me… Ehehehe…
A-Anyway, since things are like that, I have to reassure Shinozaki-san that I’m perfectly fine. However, saying “I love Onii-chan, so it’s fine” would be too embarrassing, so I can’t confess that, either…
“It’s fine. It’s true that Onii-chan can be a bit troublesome at times, but I don’t feel uncomfortable or anything.”
“Oh, and why is that?”
“It’s not just my duty as a little sister. I really—don’t hate Onii-chan after all.”
When I said that, Shinozaki-san looked slightly startled for a moment, but that changed into a smile shortly after.
“I see I see. So he isn’t hated… is it? That’s a nice response, yeah. The truth is, I was thinking that Sensei really was magnificent as an author, but I felt like I’d need to jump in if he did things to you that you hated… But, that seemed to be a waste of energy on my part. Imouto-san, I’m counting on you to take care of Sensei.”
“Y-Yes. And you don’t have to tell me. I am his little sister after all.”
“…You really are the perfect example of a little sister. I’m starting to like you siblings more and more.”
When I heard that from Shinozaki-san, I felt truly happy. And I started seeing Shinozaki-san in a better light. She’s worried about the novel itself, but also about the author and his family…
“Thanks for waiting… Let’s go home, shall we? Also, Shinozaki-san, just to make sure, you’d better not write anything weird in that article!”
Onii-chan took that moment to return from the bathroom.
“I know that. I won’t do anything to ruin your image, Sensei,” Shinozaki-san laughed.
I joined in. “Don’t worry, Onii-chan. Shinozaki-san really treasures Towano Chikai, after all.”
The following day.
“What is this article?! There’s a Shinozaki-san filter all over it, and it’s gotten even worse?! Now I’ve leveled up to be a perverted, fiendish, disgusting siscon older brother?!”
The day when the article was released arrived, and Onii-chan immediately went to call Shinozaki-san about it. But while I was reading that article, I could barely hold back my grin. After all, Onii-chan had been portrayed just as I wanted him to be. He came across as a little sister lover who could barely hold himself back!
—Shinozaki-san really is a wonderful person!